NEWSIE 1:
Did you catch the news?
Did you see the spread?
Oh you must have read
Cope is going to war
NEWSIE 2:
Ya hear what they said?
Hey this ain’t a ruse!
Wonder who will lose...
Cope is going to war.
[dialogue]
NEWSIE 1:
When he did mammalian paleontology
Without apology, Marsh published data that he stole
Now it’s in a journal eternally
Signed by him
But it wasn’t a find by him
Does he have no soul?
NEWSIE 2:
How droll!
NEWSIE 1:
He's going head to head
NEWSIE 2:
Even out the score
BOTH:
Cope isn't dead
Instead
He's going to war!
[dialogue]
NEWSIE 1:
Tell me have you heard
Well it's just the best
Never would have guessed
NEWSIE 2:
Never would have guessed!
NEWSIE 1:
Marsh is going to war!
NEWSIE 2:
He's going to war!
He won't be suppressed
They'll print every word
Though it seems absurd
BOTH:
Marsh is going to war!
[dialogue]
NEWSIE 2:
Cope is so unstable
Unable to face the facts
That he tries to erase the facts
But the facts are plain to see
He is just a liar
Entirely out of touch
And he loves himself so much
It's insanity!
NEWSIE 1:
Well, gee!
[dialogue]
CONGRESSMAN:
Never trust a Yalie in paleontology
Once a man's in college he develops unrealistic views
Marsh and Powell waste all our money
On their own pursuits
And they both are in cahoots
Have you read the news?
[dialogue]
NEWSIE 2:
Well it's pretty harsh
CONGRESSMAN:
Oh, and one more thing
NEWSIE 2:
cope was feeling sore
CONGRESSMAN:
your bones
MARSH:
Yes?
NEWSIE 1:
And now look at marsh!
CONGRESSMAN
We're going to have to take them. They were paid for with government funds, and according to some new law it seems that you're required to turn them over to us.
NEWSIE 2:
That's what happens when
NEWSIE 1:
Two overzealous, jealous men
BOTH:
Will time and time and time again
Insist on going to war!
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